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Reviews of Record Reviews

Pitchfork Just Can’t Take a Joke Anymore: What do Carl Marx and Ivanka Trump Have To Do With Chromeo?

I don’t know much about Chromeo, but I do know they are a joke. A shtick. Two Canadian EDM dudes playacting as silky, over-the-top, 70s-Euro playboys. I mean, just look at them. No seriously, take a look at that cover… Continue Reading →

Natalie Prass Critical Round-Up and P4K’s Olivia Horn-Penned Op-Ed

Sometimes a good press kit will set up your album for some easy reviews. Maybe this makes the reviewers happier (since their narrative is comfortably preconceived for them) and hopefully it ends up getting your artist a more positive review. But it… Continue Reading →

7.1? Kanye’s Record Blows But Pitchfork Can’t Admit It

7.1 out of 10. Definitely a passing score, right? It won’t get you Pitchfork’s coveted “Best New Music” or anything but it isn’t a critical lashing. If you’re a lo-fi minimalist electronic artist from Detroit biting your nails in worry… Continue Reading →

Critic Review: Jazz Monroe of Pitchfork on the Arctic Monkeys

It may be hard to imagine now, but there was a time when the pre-Conde’ Nast Pitchfork Media followed its own singular instincts. It was a site that rarely took into account the cultural group-think surrounding a particular record, band,… Continue Reading →

Critic Review: Jonah Bromwich of Pitchfork Blows Eleanor Friedberger

Ah, the PR Blowjob Review As professional critics of music criticism, we come across this type of thing all the time. It’s easily identifiable from the very first line of Jonah Bromwich’s review of the new Eleanor Friedberger album. Any… Continue Reading →

Critic Review: Alfred Soto of Pitchfork on Twerp Verse by Speedy Ortiz

Just like your favorite bands might drop an album that feels like a contractual obligation or a general swing-and-a-whiff, music critics can suffer from the same malaise. Previously commended by The Niche for his review work on The Cars, Alfred… Continue Reading →

Critic Review: Sheldon Pearce of Pitchfork on Smokepurpp’s Bless Yo Trap

As a dedicated music listener very much in touch with your own tastes and preferences, you should be able to tell from any album review if the record is worth checking out no matter the reviewer’s opinion or rating. Much… Continue Reading →

Critic Review: Erin Osmon of Pitchfork on Neil Young: “Roxy – Tonight’s The Night Live”

There’s an easy trap that many critics fall into when reviewing archival releases. It’s a fully understandable slip, but it has clearly spelled out the doom of many a review of music recorded in the ‘60s and ‘70s. When a… Continue Reading →

Critic Review: Ian Cohen of Pitchfork on Eels “The Deconstruction”

What must it be like to wake up as Ian Cohen? You open your eyes to that soft Carolina light. You stretch your arms. Your cat, named Death Grips, snuggles up close. You fumble around on the nightstand. Where’s your… Continue Reading →

Critic Review: Meaghan Garvey of Pitchfork on Lil Xan’s “Total Xanarchy”

We were SO READY to give this review a 47/100. As a matter of fact, this rating was typed in before we even sat down to peruse the review. There’s just something about people over 22 getting all screw-faced over… Continue Reading →

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